Saturday, July 14, 2007

Nanobots Begin Training To Accidentally Wipe Out Civilization

We all know how this story goes. First, we have a problem, like some sort of airborne disease or environmental issue that exists on a molecular level. Then, our brilliant scientists use their unflappable hubris to deal with the problem using nanobots, tiny robots that operate on a scale so small they can actually alter or repair individual cells and molecules. The whole process works smashingly at first, and it seems our problems are solved. Unfortunately, the use of these nanobots inevitably has some kind of unintended consequence. For instance, once they've finished eliminating some harmful chemical from the atmosphere, they mutate on their own and start eliminating all of the oxygen too. Before we can contain them, they begin reproducing at an unpredictable rate, and whatever survivors remain must board a ship and abandon our contaminated planet. This seems ok until just before the credits roll, when, unbeknownst to our heroes, it becomes apparent that the nanobots have followed them onto the ship.

The very preliminary stages of this story started unfolding a few weeks ago as a nanobot competition kicked off at the 2007 Robocup in Atlanta, Georgia. Scientists from around the world entered their microscopic harbingers of the apocalypse into competitions of speed, accuracy, and agility based around the idea of a tiny soccer match. We will, of course, monitor the progress of these tiny armies as they train to accidentally destroy us in the future.

Friday, July 6, 2007

Denmark to Weaponize Lawn Robots

The Luddington Daily News reports that Danish engineers have created the Hortibot, a "three foot-by-three-foot, self-propelled, global positioning system-directed, weed-eliminating, automated robot" (via slashdot).

We're not going to dwell on the many available puns involving robots "weeding out" rebellious humans, but rather on the terrifying manner in which this monster is equipped. "Hortibot has a variety of weed-removing attachments and methods. It can manually pick weeds, spray, or remove them using flames or a laser."

FLAMES or a LASER! Seriously? And to make matters worse, the hortibot is basically a set of attachments for the same lawn mowing robot that killed a Danish municipal worker several months ago. Since it's already killed someone, it only makes sense to make it deadlier.

So, between Denmark's mad agricultural engineers, and the guy who recently hacked his robo-sapien to add a flamethrower, there's plenty going on this week to keep us up at night.